For years I was the first person to jump into a debate and fiercely argue my views. And why wouldn’t I? I knew I was right and they were wrong.
I was also quick to jump in and solve everyone’s problems. I am really good at troubleshooting and fixing things, and to me it is easy and fun. But it created some problems:
- It created nothing but chaos.
- I was taking on their problems as my own. I already have enough problems, I don’t yours as well!
- My help was often unwanted. The other person would get upset at me for “solving their problems” instead of listening. I would get upset because I felt unappreciated.
- I robbed the other person of the learning experience that God was giving them. Learning from your mistakes and solving your own problems is the fasted path to personal growth!
So now I find myself saying “not my circus, not my monkeys.”
I don’t have to agree with your actions, choices, and lifestyle decisions. Unless they are picking my pocket or breaking my bones it isn’t my business…not my circus, not my monkeys!”
Most of the time I say it to myself, and it is a powerful reminder of some key concepts:
It isn’t my business: as time goes by I find myself taking a more libertarian view. Don’t get me wrong, I have strong personal views. I know what I believe in and have done the research to ensure my views are based on fact not just emotion or rhetoric. I also firmly believe that you have the right to your own views. While I enjoy a lively discussion and using the debate to help clarify and improve our views, my job isn’t to stamp out views that I disagree with!
It isn’t my job to fix this: I have enough on my plate as it is. I dont need ti be jumping into your problems and taking them on as my own. I don’t need the stress and you don’t want my help!
This is different from helping a friend in need. If you come to me for help I’ll be there to help. I wont solve your problems for you but I will pitch in, guide you, and be there for support.
We each have to take our own path: one of the best parts of life is learning and growing, and if I jump into your problems I rib you of this blessing.
Why do money problems cause so much friction between family and friends. Why is everyone either responsible or irresponsible, have you ever thought that there could be other factors that effect everyone lives.
Money boils down to notes and coins in circulation that is the modern focus of wealth.
You can’t buy or sell without money.
We used to get our wealth from the land before land grabs came along the last one in Europe robbed 25 million Jewish people of their right to earn their wealth and thus their independence through the land. This was done so that they could be made to work in factories instead of smallholdings with their craft making skills.
Forcing people off the land robs us all of independence and makes us all dependant on governments and economic manipulators for any wealth we can get through their work assignments.
What a joke thats turned out to be recession after recession greed robing the fair distribution of wealth.
Surely this is why we struggle, in the past you didn’t get off your ass and pick the crops or milk the beasts you didn’t eat you were being lazy but at least you didn’t have to depend on others you could starve alone.
We depend on others for wealth when we can’t survive because of unfair income distribution. Higher prices lower wages everyone suffers, bear that in mind when people get desperate. We’ve all been and still are being robbed.